it'll eat you alive

My nan is in the hospital. She has pnemonia. She is 78 years old. She has a lot of health problems, so this is not good. I don't know if I could handle it if she didn't make it through this. She has been a very big part of my life. She has raised an amazing family. The thing that makes it all worse (as if it could get worse) is that it was my kid that got her sick. How brutal is that. My nan lives with my mom for the fall/winter/spring. And my mom watches my girls while I'm at work. L has been sick for about a month & gave it to my nan about 2 weeks ago. I am going to visit her on Wednesday. It's going to be really hard. My heart is breaking. I don't know what to do.